5 Deadly Thinking Habits and How to Fix Them – Reach Positive Calm

by Solvita Bennett on September 10, 2011

How to Fix 5 Deadly Thinking Habits and Reach Positive Inner Calm Today.

"Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit. You are what you repeatedly do."

Shaquille ONeal

Our Thinking Habits are either faithful servants or tyrannical masters – just as we allow them to be. However we have the say about it and we can take our choice.

…Thoughts of hate, anger, jealousy and envy will attract to us the same kind of thoughts emanating from the minds of others. We will also attract circumstances in which we will be called upon to manifest these negative thoughts and then will receive them in turn from others. A strong thought or a thought habit will make us the centre of attraction for the corresponding thought waves of others. Like attracts like and – as you sow so shall you reap. Our general thinking habit will determine the character of the thought waves received from others as well as the thoughts emanating from ourselves. We generally find that for which we look and what we are being. There are very few people who seem to realize this and who understand the art of managing the mind. The key to the mystery is Concentration.

Let’s look at the 5 Deadly Thinking Habits and How To Fix Them:

#1 Thinking of Fear. As you may know the more we think of something the more we do think of the same. To stop the pattern the best way I've found is to find the opposite. …In this situation the opposite of fear is courage. These statements will help…instead of saying: ”I’m not afraid” say strongly “I am Courageous.”, "I am full of Courage." and say to yourself : “ There is nothing to be afraid of.” Hold the ideal firmly before you and it will gradually manifest. Let the word "Courage" sink deeply into your mind, and hold firmly until the mind fastens it in place. Imagine yourself as being Courageous. Realize that there is nothing to Fear – that Worry and Fear never helped anyone, and never will. Realize that Fear paralyzes effort, and that Courage promotes activity. It's all in the Mental Attitude! And when you have a habit of thinking courage you will attract success like a magnet. The typical friends of fear are: "what if", "but", "if", "suppose", "I'm afraid", "I can't"… these all are negative suggestions, when you can eliminate those and move towards courage, there will be not enough nourishment left for the Fear and it must go.

#2 Thinking of Hate. If you are having a tendency to hate people, you can best overcome the negative thought by cultivating Love in its place. Think Love, and act it out, as often as possible. Cultivate thoughts of kindness, and act as kindly as you can to everyone with whom you come in contact. You will have trouble at the start, but gradually Love will master Hate, and the latter will begin to droop and wither.

#3 Thoughts of "fault–finding". The condition of mind known as "fault-finding" is another emotion that grows fat with exercise. Initially fault is found with this, then with that, and finally with everything. This reminds me of one of my thinking habits I broke free from. When my son was little I used to think that every time I buy a new toy, he will break it the same day. And guess what – he always did! And then I thought to myself – this is crazy – I should stop thinking like that and started saying to myself that everything I buy for my son, he will treasure, treat well, look after and it will serve him a long time. It became a reality, as a miracle he stopped breaking things! Yes- if you will look for faults I can assure it will not need a lot of effort and you will become a fault magnet…Change the channel and let me know how it changed your life šŸ˜‰

#4 Thoughts of Jealousy. When you start feeling jealousy – focus and start thinking of your higher nature and Real Self. When you rise above these competitive thoughts, jealousy can't have any grip on you. You know and I would like to remind you that you are a magnificent being and there is no one on this planet like you. You are unique and you have your unique gifts to bring to this world. When you feel deeply what I just said, you will rise above those petty thoughts – they are unworthy for you and with the help of your will you can break the cycle. When you think positive and high vibration thoughts, the lower ones can't affect you – this is the law of nature.

#5 Thoughts of Anger. When you are tempted to burst into anger – assert the "I," and your voice will drop. Anger is unworthy of the developed Self. When you feel annoyed, frustrated and cross, remember what you really are, and rise above your feeling. Think of you as a worthy person with calm, strong and positive attitude. You are the master of your emotions and emotions will not master you whatever the situation.

The habit of thinking is the same as a paper with old folds. It just tends to fold in the same creases as before. It takes Will Power to make a new crease and then it will follow the new lines. When we make a new crease and fold it more and more in the same place it becomes easier for mind to fold along the same crease afterwards. Let us make our mental creases in the right direction. When you are playing on the extreme negative end of the mental plane you feel depressed, weak, passive, dull, fearful, cowardly. And you find yourself unable to make progress or to succeed. And your effect upon others is practically none. You are led by, rather than leading others, and are used as a human doormat or football by more positive people. You have the power to exercise your will break those deadly thinking habits and connect to your inner positive calm. My aim is not to preach as I have my own 'deadly thinking habits' to break:) …My aim is to give you practical tools to be able to break free from yours too. Let's do it together! Next week I'm going to write about Will Power and how you can benefit from exercising it. See you next week!

Please share your thoughts in the comment section below. I'd love to hear from you! :)

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  Solvita Bennett is sharing her wisdom with people from different backgrounds to find their Inner Peace and Happiness. With more than 20 years of study and practice of Personal Growth coupled with more than 10 years experience in professional teaching gives her the ability to share her ‘Secrets to Inner Peace’ in a Simple, Easy and Practical way.

Research shows that more than 95% of people lead their lives with worry. Don’t let this happen to you! Get your FREE copy of her Special Report “7 MASTER KEYS TO SOLVE THE WORRY" now.

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{ 68 comments… read them below or add one }

Paul B. Taubman, II September 10, 2011

Solvita –
Great steps to follow! AND they are simple to do!

Thanks for sharing.

Paul.

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Solvita Bennett September 10, 2011

Hi Paul – I love simplicity! People like it simple and easy… there are many books to read and sometimes you spend a lot of time to get the core message šŸ˜‰ Great to see you around!

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Hughie Bagnell September 11, 2011

Thank you Solvita…’Excellence’ certainly is a habit…’negative thinking’ is as well…great wisdom on breaking ‘negative thinking’ patterns … Hughie

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Solvita Bennett September 11, 2011

Dear Hughie thanks for stopping by and your comment!

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Olga Hermans September 11, 2011

Those 5 thinking habits are deadly emotions indeed. Did you ever read a book about “deadly emotons”, by Dr.Don Colbert. I really do like it that you make us look at the opposite Solvita!! Great and thanks!!

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Solvita Bennett September 11, 2011

Hi Olga – great to see you here! Yes – the thinking leads us to emotions, when we can control and transform the deadly thinking habits and build the new ones – the emotions change at the same time. Never read that book though… Thanks for stopping by! :)

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Anastasiya Day September 11, 2011

Solvita, Great article! I agree – Great steps to follow and they are simple to do! Thanks for sharing.

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Solvita Bennett September 11, 2011

Dear Anastasiya – it is great to see you around! The most important part is to remember to check our thinking habits, when we feel down – it is much quicker to fix them at the BEGINNING, because thoughts attract similar nature thoughts from others and it is harder then to turn around.

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Crystal O'Connor September 11, 2011

Such an uplifting and empowering article Solvita! Love the part about the jealousy and how to overcome it…so many people suffer from this plagued by this and only hurt themselves in the end.

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Solvita Bennett September 11, 2011

Yes Crystal – people are sometimes so used to suffering that they accept as a norm of feeling and living, there is better way to feel and no one should feel down. Who knows how to make the switch – never will be affected from negativity for a long time :)

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pat September 11, 2011

I really enjoyed reading your post. Great insights to 5 thinking habits that can really pull us down and keep us from happiness and success. Thanks

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Solvita Bennett September 11, 2011

It is great to see you here Pat!! We all need some practical tools to use to get success and happiness! We have a choice – which is wonderful! :)

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denny hagel September 11, 2011

One of the greater truths is how powerful our thoughts are and how powerful we are to change them…wonderful article! Thanks!

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Solvita Bennett September 12, 2011

Yes – Denny …that is when we realize the power we can direct it and if we stay ignorant to it we can destroy our lives. Great comment – thank you!

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Beau Henderson September 11, 2011

I loved this article. Its poignant that the first step was reversing thoughts of fear to courage. Fear is crippling, and will keep anyone from reaching their full potential if their is not a mindshift.

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Solvita Bennett September 12, 2011

Thank you! Yes – this is so true Beau! :)

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Renee Mclaughlin September 12, 2011

Happiness IS the way! And it’s all in how you control your thoughts. Glass half full or half empty…it’s up to you. Thanks for spreading the message of inner peace in such a beautiful way!

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Solvita Bennett September 12, 2011

I agree – thought world dictates what we are going to attract and the knowledge of managing it – is the key!

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Wil September 13, 2011

Such a simple plan but I’ll be it yields great rewards. Thank you for this great article, Solvita.

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Carl Mason-Liebenberg September 14, 2011

“Our Thinking Habits are either faithful servants or tyrannical masters ..” Love that statement! Will be sharing this post!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you Carl!

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John Murphy September 14, 2011

Very interesting post! I feel sorry for people who seem to be consumed with negativity. I don’t know what’s going on in their lives, but I think if I were that miserable, I would seek professional help. I wonder if research would validate my experience and opinion that happy and well-adjusted people are more creative than unhappy people. I find that being around negative people can really sap your energy. Thanks for a post to think about!

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Solvita Bennett September 14, 2011

Thanks John!! Yes- there is more negativity around than positivity – you just have to switch on TV šŸ˜‰ And as soon as we feel discouraged we join the low quality thoughts and so attract more of the same completely unaware. With awareness of this process we can then apply our knowledge to rise above and with will power change the thought patterns. Negative people often don’t know what they are doing – as they are most of the time completely unaware or ignorant to the law of attraction. What is interesting that when we have high vibration positive thoughts, they are much more powerful and so the negative thoughts from others can’t affect us – it is the Law of Nature.

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Dr. Daisy Sutherland September 14, 2011

Thanks Solvita for sharing tips that folks can actually apply:) Hugs to you!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Hugs to you Dr. Daisy! Thanks for stopping by! :)

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Susan Preston September 14, 2011

I love this, Solvita! This resonated with me, as it reaffirms what I believe that, “What we Focus on is what we get.” Thank you, for sharing this, you are a great inspiration to so many of us :)

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you Susan! Great to see you here! :)

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Dan Gosling September 14, 2011

Wonderful advice! But denying your anger can lead to problems. Sometimes it is better to claim it and THEN release to a more positive feeling. Trying to jump to far emotionally can lead to mental muscle strain! If you can’t rise above then go through – as quickly as possible and without hurting others.

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Solvita Bennett September 14, 2011

Great advise Dan! I’m giving more details about the anger release in my free report…and there is one more article on this subject HERE Thanks a lot! :)

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Deborah September 14, 2011

Great article and clear steps to thinking for success and greatness! Everything begins with a thought and with our thoughts we create the world we experience daily! Wonderful Solvita, thank you for sharing!

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Solvita Bennett September 14, 2011

Dear Deborah, it is great to see you here – thanks for the comment! :)

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Jennifer Bennett September 14, 2011

Love this Solvita! I have found that many times, fear gets in the way of people really living the life that they were meant for. Thanks so much for the great reminder! Many blessings to you!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thanks for stopping by and many blessing to you too Jennifer!

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Nancy Olson September 14, 2011

Great post! Sometimes we blame other things and it usually is not our thinking. This is a great reminder when things are not working out in our favor, take a look at who you are trying to blame.

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you Nancy! When we blame others or circumstances – we really lose our power and disconnect from our Real Self. We are so much more powerful in creating our world than we realize! :)

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Jeff Weiser September 14, 2011

It takes a great deal of discipline and thought to eliminate thoughts of fear, hate, anger, jealousy, and blame. Buddhists spend a lifeline contemplating these things and following the Path. All of us should spend (I try to) 15 minutes every day sitting and clearing our heads of these thoughts..and try to wake up the next day eliminating one of these thoughts from our every-day lives..it isn’t easy, but it is the way to enlightenment and inner peace.

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Life is wonderful and when we live in harmony with nature the flow of life will direct us to enlightenment. It is hard to eliminate anything, as the law of attraction will attract more of what we want to eliminate. When we place our focus on what we want to think of that is when the law of attraction will bring to us thoughts of he same nature. That is when I said to focus and think of opposite like instead of “Iā€™m not afraid.” think “I am Courageous”, as what we focus on we get more of every time – this is important to remember. Thank you – great comment!! :)

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Marie September 14, 2011

Great steps. If everyone would just follow them, think what a happier and more peaceful world we could live in. All enduring principles of peace.

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thanks – I’m glad they are easy!

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Janis Meredith September 14, 2011

I was reading this morning about getting on the right “train of thought”. In my case, it means thinking things the way God wants me to. Thanks for your thoughtful reminders!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

This is really good Janis – think the God wants you to!

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Elise Adams @AdamsOrganizing September 14, 2011

Love this one the best, out of all I’ve read here! When I first read your title it sounded overwhelming…I thought maybe I could tackle one ‘stinkin thinkin’ habit but when you talked about creases (When we make a new crease and fold it more and more in the same place it becomes easier for mind to fold along the same crease afterwards. Let us make our mental creases in the right direction.) I could see how they all fit together. All the 5 negative areas you talk about are in the arena of darkness NOT light! So many believe that the feelings associated with these thoughts are unmanagable. I love how you describe changing the thoughts which changes our feelings and brings peace. Really truly helpful–going to bookmark this one :-)

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you! It happens to me sometimes too, when I read books sometimes there are things which don’t resonate with me and then there is something – which can turn the world around! I must admit from time to time I write a lot to ‘awake our thinking’ so we can get more deeper into our self-development, as once we get the message on a deeper level, we can amend our beliefs with ease. Great to see you here! :)

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Rhonda Uretzky September 14, 2011

The only one I might disagree with is Anger. Sometimes, anger is a stepping stone when you are lifting yourself up from Depression; it awakens you from the deadening feeling of being depressed. Hopefully it is just a stepping stone, a place where you alight for a moment and jump to the next emotionally empowered level….and then you can thank the person who “angered” you awake again.

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Solvita Bennett September 14, 2011

Great comment! Yes – for depressed people anger is a relief and a stepping stone…We all have our thresholds – the more we evolve the higher our threshold becomes and less angry we are. Thanks for stopping by! :)

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Mary Kate September 14, 2011

Great article! May we all be instruments of peace <3 Thanks for the reminders, Solvita!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you Mary!

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Michele September 14, 2011

Solvita,
I LOVE your analogy of the folded piece of paper and old habits. The solutions you offer to the 5 deadly thinking habits are good solutions that are easy to implement.
Great Job!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Hi Michele! Great to see you here and thanks for the comment!

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Norma Doiron@Social Media | Graphics | Web Design | Health, Wellness, Weight Loss September 14, 2011

Absolutely agree with you, Solvita. What we put out there comes back to haunt or bless us. Our words are seeds we plant all around us – they will either bring a harvest of good or bad things. Thanks for sharing ! x0x
Norma Doiron
@ the LEARNED Preneur

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Yes – they are truly seeds!! Thanks Norma!

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Julie Weishaar September 14, 2011

Solvita, the power of positive thinking always prevails! Thanks for making it look so simple!

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

It is simple – our mind likes to make things complicated – its an old trick! šŸ˜‰

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Jaime September 14, 2011

Great post Solvita. I can testify to the fact that changing your thinking habits do change your life. Once I stopped the negative thoughts, many door began to open for me

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you Jaime! You are blessed to find the right way of thinking and confirmation that you are on the right path! It is a great feeling once we discover the Truth! :)

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Ingrid September 15, 2011

I agree. “The habit of thinking is like paper with old folds.”. It’s hard to change your views, but your tips are excellent starting points! Great post!

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Living the Balanced Life September 15, 2011

We ARE what we think. and if we allow ourselves to focus on these thoughts and patterns it will have a negative effect on our lives. Great steps to alter our course by changing our thinking!
Bernice

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Thank you Bernice! We have to start where we are and little by little move to the better and better place! :)

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Kelly September 15, 2011

This is a nice and thoughtful article, Solvita.

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Solvita Bennett September 16, 2011

Great to see you here Kelly! Thanks a lot!

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Jennifer September 18, 2011

Thanks Solvita, I try to keep the fact that we are what we repeatedly do at the forefront of my mind. Sometimes it’s hard not to slip into the negative thinking you point out here, especially because it’s how we are conditioned, expected and used to reacting to things. I’ve found that it takes a lot of intentional living to eliminate this wrong-thinking! I try to celebrate little victories – like having sympathy for the driver who cuts me off because he must be in a hurry and running late for something really important, rather than cursing him as an ignorant jerk . . .

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Solvita Bennett September 20, 2011

Dear Jennifer, you are so right – it takes complete awareness…The more aware we can be the more we can change…and so our situations also change. It is fascinating how we can actually create life on our terms as soon as we become aware. Without awareness nothing can happen and sadly people think they are not responsible for the life they create themselves due to ignorance or just lack of knowledge and so they create suffering instead of joy, nothing can be worse then give up our power to something or someone else. Thanks for your great comment! :)

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Saarah October 4, 2011

I really enjoyed reading that. I’m def a firm believer in what you put out there you get in return…I do have a difficult time with the jealousy….not in the sense where i get all huffy and puffy and wish bad on anyone – I’m nowhere near like that….but in the sense that when I see someone excelling at something (which i’m ALWAYS so happy for and genuinely praising them), I can’t help but to think that its taking forever for my efforts to come into fruition. I always have to remind myself that things happen for a reason and to keep at it…but its SO hard. Any further advice for me on this?

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Solvita Bennett October 4, 2011

This is very natural, as we are programmed to compete and only when we truly realize what is BS and what is real, we can see world with different eyes. There is no competition, when you look in history and see some people succeed very rapidly and die very young or some getting rich very fast and loosing everything..as you say all is for a reason, only one thing can stop you ~ is you and no one else…jealousy is not bad when you look at it ~ it can force you actually to strive for more in life…it is not necessary though as you truly don’t need it ~ you are unique and therefore no one can take your place, you can hold yourself back read this :)

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Colin October 28, 2012

Wonderful tips for anyone paralised by worry and anxiety. Thank you very much.

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Ime February 27, 2013

Thanks for writing such a great article, what you write all bad habits are in my mind. Now i will try my best to remove these bad habits and think positively. Once again thank you for sharing such a great article with us.

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zara May 20, 2013

This is a great article,

I think i’m a magnet for negative thinking. I wake up in the morning and i’m plagued by negative thoughts and feelings to the extent it affects my ability to wake up. It’s really not nice and I’m trying to beat this feeling by just straightaway getting up and going for a walk. It’s a really bad habit and I don’t know where these thoughts come from. Do you think it could be aswell if you’re surrounded by negativity that has an affect??

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Solvita Bennett May 25, 2013

Dear Zara, thanks for stopping by! The negativity is very influential and had enormous strength to pull you down. In times, when you want to free yourself from the influence and rise up to positivity and so to different, uplifting, life-giving and positive thoughts at the very beginning is good to restrict yourself from this negative influence. The thoughts you think are not necessary your own. You normally have dominant thoughts and so create a center of attraction to the quality of those thoughts. As a result you attract then more and more the same quality of thoughts and when you start identified yourself with them you feel very bad (or down). One of the practices is to let the thoughts flow through the mind without emotions and view them just as data rather than something that is of importance. I could write a lot about this subject, but the shortest idea I could give is the solution, that can help everybody. Feed your mind with positivity. When you wake up with negative thoughts, it is only an indication that you went to sleep with them. So to brake this pattern, you have to break the ‘going to sleep’ ritual. Make yourself relaxed, think of everything you can that makes you appreciative for your life, the smallest things you can think of. Go to sleep with smile and feel connection to loving Higher Power or nature, with trust in the process of life. When during the night you wake up, just view whatever comes to mind as unimportant and ‘just data’. When you will wake up, you will find yourself in a much better place. This needs to be practiced every day for at least 21 days to see the results, however when done first time right, you will see the results immediately, there is no doubt. Keep in touch and soak up the best (positive) you can… become a ‘positivity sponge’. :)

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