7 Reasons To Practise Detachment – Connect To Inner Calm Now.

by Solvita Bennett on March 18, 2011

How to create Positive Inner Calm by practicing detachment…

"Attachment is a great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached."
Simone Weil

…In this article I will share a personal story about the lessons learned using detachment. Before I go any further I’d like just briefly to say that we create a lot of suffering and lose our inner peace when we are strongly attached to material things, emotions, beliefs or people. The attachment itself is neither good or bad. It only becomes a suffering, when you are holding on to something to strong, which stops you from moving forwards, achieving state of freedom, happiness, security, inner calm. Also when you are holding to some old things, you are not letting new and better things come to you…

…It was more than 10 years ago I had a dilemma in my life.
I was fortunate and had inherited a house, with a big garden, when my grandmother passed away. However the house I had to share with my sister. I didn’t live there, as I rented a flat at that time, and my sister was very happy to live there. The dilemma was that she was talking, how she would love to own the whole house, so she could do with it what she wanted. However s
he didn’t have the means to buy from me the rest of it. I also loved the house, as I spent all my childhood in it and was close to my grandma. I was also very attached to the house. So much so that it felt painful just thinking about giving it away to my sister, especially as we were not very close as sisters…

At that time I’ve read many books about the importance of detachment, and how you can receive much better things when you give away the things you don’t need. Well it seams easy to understand and know, but in real life it is actually quite difficult to do. We get very attached to things, especially houses, cars, as our ego feels more secure having material assets, as it believes only in everything material…and so as I also have an ego it was having a tantrum, by convincing me that, if I give away my biggest material asset, I’ll never be able to recover the loss, I’ll never be able to feel secure, and when I’ll be left with nothing – that will be the END! Deep inside I felt that I must let it go and I made a decision to trust God and do the very thing my ego was most afraid of…I gave the house away for free as a gift with all the furniture in it. I felt happy initially when I signed all the documents and formalities, but it didn’t last for long… only after couple of years I realized that I had resentment deep inside of me, what I discovered was, that I gave it all away physically but I was still attached to it emotionally! That is what actually makes the difference and the secret power of detachment.

When you are practicing detachment it is important to let go the emotional part of it sometimes even more, than physical.
Why I'm sharing this story with you is that I also wanted to share the gifts I received by trusting God and doing what I believed was serving my higher self and was for higher good to others.
When you are ready to let go of things and you have a feeling of calling deep inside of you, ego will not let you, as it feels threatened and wants to hold on to everything it can…

…as ego is small and all the things you have, not only material things create the illusion for ego to hold on to… and the illusion is what ego is all about!

…When you can overcome this challenge and do what will serve for the highest good, you are opening the door to something much bigger, you are becoming co-creator of your destiny and you take responsibility for every action that you do or don’t do.
What are the 7 reasons for practicing detachment and what gifts do you receive by doing it:
1. You create a strong knowing that even if you loose everything, you will not loose yourself, as there is source of supply from other places, which strengthens your faith and gives you inner calm, that you can trust yourself.
2.  You know that the things don’t have any power over you and you have the choice of letting go, you are free to forgive, you are free to create something new. This gives you power, confidence and inner calm.
3. The feeling of ‘having not enough’ deserts you, which gives you sense of security and fills your heart with gratitude.
4. You create a feeling of positive expectation, which makes your life exciting to live, as you are looking forward to new people you will meet, to new adventures you will participate  in and new opportunities.
5. You feel rich and abundant – as you know that you have more than enough – as you are able to give and not only take, which is feeling of expansion. T
his feeling opens doors for more riches to flow into your life.
6. You create the ability to receive, as you know that the giver will be receiving gifts ten times bigger as it is the law of God, Universe, Source…
7. You know that there is nothing you own anyway, they are only temporary possessions and you (the essence of you) are much bigger than that, which gives you inspiration, motivation to evolve, expand, create and enjoy life you want…
When you practice the exercise of material and emotional detachment – you are connecting to your inner peace deep inside.

You can start by asking yourself some questions:

  •  What is it that you are so attached to emotionally, physically that you feel is stopping you to move forwards in some ways?
  • What would you do if you wouldn’t have this attachment?
  • Would you say NO to good things, or things you just tolerate and let them go, to allow better things come into your life?
  • Have a look around…are there some things that don’t serve you anymore, or even remind you of the past, which you would rather not be reminded of?
  • Is there a friendship, which drains your energy and you have a bad feeling about?
  • Is there a resentment within you that you are holding onto very strongly?
  • Are there beliefs you are so attached to, which are no longer serving your higher good?

Have an inventory today and do a 'spring clean' as the Spring is here now!
Please feel very welcome to share your thoughts or stories in the comment section below, I'd love to hear from you :)

{ 13 comments… read them below or add one }

Rose Kirkland March 18, 2011

I absolutely love your article and post about detachment…Just my kind of content and information.  I, too, have had to learn many lessons on learning to detach.  Some were harder to do.  I can identify with detaching from the house your grandmother gave you.  I have also lost my beautiful dream home which was very painful–due to somebody's ignorance and fear.  Great content and reasons to detach… Keep up the good work. 

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Solvita March 19, 2011

Rose, thanks for stopping by and I’m happy to hear that you enjoyed reading it! :)

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Antoine McCoy March 20, 2011

Solvita, this was a powerful article.  I love all the points, but #6 really resonated with me about being able to receive more from God when we detach from things.  I know I stubbornly have held on to things in the past and missed some of God's blessings.  Doors opened when I made the choice to detach.  Thanks for the reminder!

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Solvita March 20, 2011

Thanks Antoine! The number 6 is very tricky as it can be sometimes that people have to learn the art of receiving and be OK with it :)

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Donovan Grant March 20, 2011

Solvita, nice post.This definitely made me think and I for sure will be having a spring clean. Just like our houses, we do need to have a little declutter of the mind every now and then to make room for new gifts. Thanks for the reminder.

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Solvita March 20, 2011

Donovan, It’s good to hear that you are up to it now, let me know how it all goes :)

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Carol Giambri March 20, 2011

Solvita, Detachment is not always easy but as a process when we see the blessings to come. As I read this came forth:  Cleaning out the Weeds of Detachment. Sometimes we don't realize some things that hold us back.  Life's a journey!

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Solvita March 20, 2011

Yes Carol – life is an experience and neither bad or good- it is just an experience, when we look at it from that point of view, become present and in peace with it, as it is, we become detached and that opens doors for blessings to come, as you say :)

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Victoria Gazeley March 20, 2011

This is the key to thriving in this world, while still having compassion and concern for others.  It's a fine balance, but so much healthier once you get the hang of it.

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Solvita March 20, 2011

Dear Victoria, yes – this is the key, when you get the understanding and ability to open your mind and get to do it – your world will never be the same. Compassion, inner peace, love and connection is spiritual experience and being able to be present makes it success and happiness.

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Anastasiya March 22, 2011

Solvita, love this blog! :)

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Solvita March 22, 2011

Anastasiya, thanks for stopping by and enjoying the reading :)

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titi October 28, 2014

Ow gosh I love this! Have been disappointed by everyone in my life. Have been made a family scapegoat for years. I have endured terrible abuse as a result from all over. I guess my biggest struggle was not letting go and my bruised ego. Reached a point of wanting to committing suicide, I just didn’t understand why everyone I loved would hurt me so bad. This article is just what I needed to pick myself up again! Thank you so much, I have renewed hope because of you, no more attaching to people or material stuff. God bless

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